|“||You're a pretty one. If I were you I would try not to anger Count Olaf, or he might wreck that pretty little face of yours.||”|
— The Bald Man to Violet Baudelaire
The Bald Man with the Long Nose, better known simply as the Bald Man, was a member of Count Olaf's theatre troupe and an antagonist in A Series of Unfortunate Events. The Bald Man remains with Olaf through several of his scheme to obtain the Baudelaire fortune. He is eaten by lions in The Carnivorous Carnival.
He is first seen by the orphans when he, the Hook-Handed Man, the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender and the White-Faced Women arrive at the Count's house. Olaf introduces his troupe to the three children while they were in the kitchen preparing dinner for them. After Olaf and the rest of the troupe move to the dining room, the bald man briefly stays behind and scares Violet, the eldest child, by telling her that she's a "pretty one", and that she should be careful lest that "pretty little face of hers" would be wrecked by Count Olaf.
He soon joins the others at the table, and they begin to pound on it rudely in strict rhythm while waiting for the orphans to serve their dinner, which turns out to be pasta puttanesca. Afterwards, the troupe began pounding on the table a second time again until dessert is served. They leave to perform in a play after watching Olaf "punish" the children due to them standing up to him. The outcome of their actions involved Olaf slapping Klaus across the face.
Later on, during the troupe's performance of The Marvelous Marriage, which was actually a front created by Olaf to be wed to Violet in order to gain the children's fortune, the bald man oversaw the preparations for the event. He tells both Violet and Klaus to do exactly what Olaf instructs them to do. Otherwise, Sunny, who was currently dangling from Olaf's tower in a birdcage, would be dropped to her doom. During the play, he and Klaus portrays the audience members so he can "supervise" the latter. After Olaf's scheme was exposed to the play's attendees, another one of his henchmen turned off the lights in order for he and his associates to make their hasty escape.
After Violet, Klaus and Sunny are taken to stay at Lucky Smells Lumbermill in the care of its owner Sir and his partner Charles, the Bald Man solely accompanies Count Olaf to Paltryville where the mill is located. There, Olaf disposes of Foreman Firstein, and replaces him with a disguised Bald Man, under the alias of Foreman Flacutono. He wears a curly white wig, with a white surgical mask covering his mouth and long nose.
The Baudelaires wake up to the sound of Foreman Flacutono banging two large metal pots together loudly. He tells them it's time for work and that there's a new shipment of logs "just waiting to be made into lumber". Phil, an optimistic lumber worker, introduces Flacutono to the Baudelaries. The "foreman" drops his metal pots and replies that he wasn't told they would be midgets, though nevertheless puts them to works.
Later, after a few more days of working, the foreman deliberately trips up Klaus as the latter is on his way to get back to work after his short break, rendering the boy's glasses hopelessly broken. Klaus yells that he tripped him up, but the foreman pretends not to have noticed. Charles disapproves of Flacutono's attitude and takes Klaus to the local optometrist Georgina Orwell.
After Orwell hypnotises Klaus, Flacutono orders him to operate the stamping machine, but he ends up causing an accident and injuring Phil's leg. After the accident, the foreman trips Klaus again in the same way, but this time sends all three of the orphans to the optometrist.
Later, Foreman Flacutono and Shirley, Count Olaf's disguise, force a hypnotized Klaus to push Charles, who is tied to a log, into a large sawblade. However, Violet and Klaus intervene, and soon Charles is freed, but Dr. Orwell ends up falling onto the saw. The two disguised villains are confronted by the workers, but they soon escape out of a window.
He is in charge of the operation of the world's first cranioectomy on Violet. He and the Hook-Handed Man admit that they are growing tired of chasing the Baudelaires, following a brief and heated argument between the two henchmen. He expresses his desire for Violet to wake up during the procedure before the show begins.
After the Hook Handed Man receives a thunderous applause for his introduction to the event, the Bald Man jealously follows with his own introduction to gain a fair amount of applause for himself. During the actual procedure, Klaus and Sunny, disguised as the nurses in place off the White Faced Women, stall the procedure with various distractions, irritating the Bald Man and Hook Handed Man all the while.
When the Baudelaire's are exposed by Esme, Violet finally wakes up and they all escape the theatre. After Esme sets the Hospital on fire, the Bald Man escapes and soon leaves with the rest of the troupe in Count Olaf's car.
The troupe, including the Bald Man, help Count Olaf dig a pit in which a pack of starving lions are placed for an upcoming show in which one of the carnival's freaks will be thrown to and devoured by the beasts. At one point, the Bald man says that someone else may accidentally fall to the lions.
During the actual show, when the two conjoined freaks Beverly and Elliot, who are actually Violet and Klaus in disguise, are picked to be eaten and no-one is willing to push them, mayhem ensues within the audience.
The Bald Man is among those who is eager to claim the reward and tries to shove the two conjoined siblings to the lions. In the chaos, both Madame Lulu and the Bald Man are accidentally pushed into the pit and are both devoured alive.
|I am NOT a MONKEY!
The following article or section concerns information that is considered even less canonical than the chance of a happy ending. Any information following should not be used as a source for the canon of the book series.
The Bald Man with the Long Nose appears in the Brad Silberling 2004 film adaptation Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events, portrayed by Luis Guzmán. He doesn't seem to have a long nose, and is shorter than he is portrayed in the books. He is credited as "Bald Man".
He is first seen as the troupe returns to Olaf's house where Violet and Klaus are scrubbing the floor. Olaf orders them to prepare dinner for him and the rest of the troupe, and then he and his associates walk through to the entertainment room to rehearse their upcoming play. Olaf asks who should play the "bald-headed stranger", and the bald man cheers and raises his hand. Olaf deliberately ignores him and pretends to think hard about the decision. The bald man continues to try to attract his attention until the count turns to him and asks if he wants something, and the henchman points to his bald head. Olaf ignores him and moves onto the next role.
After the Baudelaires tell the troupe that dinner is served, Olaf is enraged to find that they haven't made roast beef and destroys the pasta puttanesca the children had prepared. The troupe stand up and clap and cheer, but they are surprised when Violet speaks up to Olaf and says he didn't tell them he wanted roast beef. They then watch as Olaf grabs Sunny, the youngest orphan, and strikes Klaus across the face. After Olaf puts the children to their bed, the troupe continue rehearsing downstairs.
In the troupe's performance of The Marvelous Marriage, which was actually a scheme in which Olaf would actually marry Violet and inherit her fortune, the bald man is in control of the hydraulics. Before the play, he notices a critic coming into the audience and informs the Hook-Handed man who asks for the critic's cape. The critic tells them not to try to get on his good side and sits down in the crowd. The Bald man and the hook-handed man both also help Justice Strauss prepare for her role as a judge. When Olaf says that the other actors he'd considered for her role lacked something, the bald man suggested hair. The bald man is offended when Olaf calls another character in the play a "naked-headed knave". He later trades his job at the hydraulics for a role in the play as a camel, though this ends up allowing Klaus to escape and climb up into Olaf's tower room.
When the play is foiled and Olaf's plan is ruin, he and the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender assist in Oaf's escape. What happened to the Bald Man after this is left unclear, though it is likely that he escaped with Olaf.
The Bald Man with the Long Nose appears as a recurring boss character in the video game, based on the 2004 Brad Silberling film, voiced by S. Scott Bullock. He first appears in the kitchen of Count Olaf's house, devouring meatballs from a bowl with a fork perfect for Violet's recently thought-up invention. Klaus asks the Bald Man politely if he could borrow the fork, but is declined. A boss battle begins, where the Bald Man flings the meatballs at the children using the fork, and Klaus is given the task of using the Brilliant Bopper to defeat the Bald Man and obtain the fork. The Bald Man then utters, "Stick a fork in me."
He appears later in Uncle Monty's garden courtyard area, disguised as Snake Soothsayer. He sinisterly offers to play a song for Violet and Klaus, which hypnotizes the snakes in Violet's Reptile Retriever, causing them to escape. A boss battle begins where Klaus, armed with the Brilliant Bopper, must attack The Bald Man in each of his four spots while avoiding the poison spitting frogs. Once the four spot part of the battle is finished, the player is then automatically switched to Violet to retrieve the snakes while avoiding the Bald Man's flute sonic blast. The process must be repeated until the fight ends.
The Bald Man then appears at Damocles Dock as the first boss, posing as a musical shop occupant who attacks Violet and Klaus with an anchor.
His final appearance occurs in the Marvelous Marriage battle sequence, where Klaus, armed with the eye, must attempt to burn the villain who holds the marriage certificate. The Bald Man appears among the potential holders of the certificate.
|“||I'd like to make a withdrawal.||”|
It is revealed he has incredible painting skills, as shown when he painted Esmé Squalor. Esmé, however, immediately criticizes his painting for getting her nose wrong.
Unlike the book The Carnivorous Carnival, the Bald Man is not killed when Count Olaf throws Madame Lulu to the Volunteer Feline Detectives. He joins the rest of Count Olaf's troupe in heading to the Mortmain Mountains to seek out the V.F.D. Headquarters. This is because the writers wanted Olaf to be at his highest moment at the end of season 2, as well as the beginning of season 3.
In The Slippery Slope: Part Two, he along with the White-Faced Women and the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender become disillusioned with Count Olaf's villainy and reject his orders to thrown Sunny Baudelaire of the peak of Mount Fraught. They desert Count Olaf and travel down the mountain. They are later seen performing in a play.
The Bald Man with the Long Nose is sadistic and devious; more so than his fellow henchmen such as the Hook-Handed Man, but less so than Olaf himself. He and the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender are the only troupe members in the books who don't ever question Olaf's villainy, and stay loyal to him until their deaths.
He is also very rude and aggressive, as shown when he disguises himself as the Foreman at Lucky Smells Lumbermill. His actions and attitude while disguised greatly contrast with Count Olaf's other associates, who all have a typically friendly and subtle demeaner while disguised.
He also acts creepily towards Violet, scaring her with devious and potentially flirtatious remarks.
The bald man is portrayed as being slightly dim and gullible. He doesn't talk much and seems to be quite shy, though he is able to handle the hydraulics during The Marvelous Marriage play. The bald man doesn't seem to be as evil as Olaf or the Hook-Handed Man, in contrast to his personality in the books. He is quite gullible as he trades his job at the hydraulics for a role in The Marvelous Marriage, which allows Klaus to escape Olaf's clutches.
In the Netflix TV series, the bald man is mainly distinguished by his height and strength rather than actually being bald. He is quite dim-witted, and often looks confused. In some moments of the series he shows signs of not being completely evil but, unlike most of the other members of Olaf's troupe, he seems to be generally an evil person. He also seems to have feelings for Esmé Squalor.
In The Slippery Slope: Part Two, The Bald Man with the Long Nose becomes disillusioned with Count Olaf and rejects his orders to throw Sunny Baudelaire off the cliff. Before leaving with the disaffected White-Faced Sisters and the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender, he tells Olaf to look after Esmé.
- In the book The Wide Window, Violet finds him the scariest in Olaf's troupe. Klaus disagrees, saying he finds the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender the scariest.
- In the Wide Window: Part Two, he mentions Ike Anwhistle by his name. This leads people to believe he might be in V.F.D or just read a book about him.
- PROSE: The Carnivorous Carnival
- PROSE: The Miserable Mill
- PROSE: The Hostile Hospital
- TV: The Hostile Hospital: Part Two
- The Wide Window