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Mr. Mallahan is Moxie Mallahan's father. He is the chief editor of the Stain'd Newspaper and resides in the Stain'd Lighthouse. It doesn't seem like he does much of anything because he is usually told to be sleeping. He never leaves the lighthouse.


Early Life

Mr. Mallahan used to be in charge of The Stain'd Lighthouse, the only newspaper in Stain'd-by-the-Sea, along with his wife. He used to jokingly refer to his workers as "troublesome underlings."[1] 

When Stain'd-by-the-Sea's economy crashed, his wife left, claiming to be looking for a job at a new newspaper. Mr. Mallahan seemed to understand she would never return, as he had several books on how to raise a daughter alone. He fell into a depression that resulted in him almost never leaving bed.

His daughter, Moxie, took over most of his work for him, including handling his correspondence.[2] She says that he doesn't do a good job of handling things,[1] and she stopped going to school in order to take care of the newspaper.[3] Snicket says that Moxie is "practically unchaperoned" due to his neglect.[4]

He seems to be somewhat addicted to coffee, as he is often mentioned in relation to the drink.

Who Could That Be at This Hour?

Mr. Mallahan answers a ringing doorbell to find S. Theodora Markson and Lemony Snicket. Theodora claims that they are a newlywed couple on their honeymoon who want to see the lighthouse, and Mallahan shrugs and lets them inside. Theodora allows Snicket to run off and play with Moxie while she talks to Mallahan, who had just been trying to find the coffee. She asks him if there is anything in the house that's worth a great deal of money, and he says something about his only daughter. 

Later, Moxie receives a call from Hangfire, imitating Snicket and telling her and her father to go to Handkerchief Heights. She is unable to wake him, so she goes alone. Hangfire later imitates Mr. Mallahan in a phone call to Theodora to try and convince her to separate Moxie and Snicket.

Later Books

Snicket assumes that Mr. Mallahan is close by due to the presence of a pot of coffee in Moxie's kitchen when she helps him cut his hair. Later, Moxie calls to him that she's going out. She receives no response.[1]

After running away from his mother, Kellar Haines moves into the lighthouse with the Mallahans.[3]


  • Moxie has a watch that he used to own.[1]


Lady Mallahan
Unknown Generations
Mr. Mallahan
Ms. Mallahan
Moxie Mallahan