- Teaman: You seem a little young to be babysitting.
- Lemony Snicket: I'm not young, and I'm not babysitting. I need help finding this woman.
The Teaman is a minor character who appears in The Hero of the Story.
- Lemony Snicket: Excuse me. Have you seen a woman with a baby carriage?
- Teaman: No one's around. I'm closing up.
During a day of working the teashop, the teaman is approached by a young Lemony Snicket, asking if he'd seen a woman with a baby carriage, who'd given the thirteen-year-old her baby to watch. The teaman does not seem to be listening and dismisses him, putting the cups on a rack to dry. As he closes the door to the shop, he remarks that Snicket seems a little young to be babysitting, and after Snicket remarks that he's not and needs to find the woman, the teaman shrugs and tells him to go ahead and call the police. Frustrated, Snicket points out that he is not helping.
Later in the day, the police arrive at the man's home to ask him about Snicket, who is suspected of kidnapping the Emperor of Cramiton. He informs them that no woman came by the shop, and that Snicket was holding a baby but not its babysitter.